stanley's secret

stanley is a custodian here in the building where i work. he's a thin, relatively young man of some kind of russian descent. he's always happy.

stanley has the most ridiculous way of greeting everyone, radiating an almost obnoxious amount of joy and excitement. i think everyone's first inclination is to wonder what might be wrong with him. isn't that sad? and i think it's only obnoxious to the rest of us because of our inability to reciprocate. i actually saw one woman, a personal injury lawyer, turn around and take a detour in the middle of his overzealous greeting. he didn't flinch, only restarted his greeting on someone else.

me, i'm at least willing to fake it for him. sometimes i feel like it's a part of my job to be that way.

i'd like to see him upset or anxious. is it possible? is he capable of anything but pure, unadulterated bliss? and if it's true, how does he do it? i think he needs to spread the word. let his secret loose on the public. cheer us all up a little bit.

the city has made me anxious. riding the bus, paying twice as much for everything, braving the wind and the hoards of people barrelling along with their sunglasses and their clenched fists. everything is more difficult in such a busy place as chicago. even the most ordinary tasks become major endeavors. but i don't presume to think people outside of the city live perfect, tranquil lives. only that i've noticed a marked difference since i've moved here. it's relative, i guess.

that being said, with the stress of the city comes more opportunity, more diversity, and more things to do. that's the trade off.

i've started working out again, and i think that will help me chill out. it always does. especially if i spend some time on pilates breathing exercizes. besides, i need to lose weight. physically and figuratively.